Monthly Archives: July 2008

Disco Valante is returning to the United States!…UPDATE

After six months of living in the Middle East, I’m heading back to the States.  I’m currently in Kuwait and have only 72 hours until I touch down in the US on 30AUG.  At the airport, I will immediately get a private car to race me to my house.  Once in Washington, DC, I’ve only got a few days to tie up some loose ends concerning bank loans and administrative paperwork with the company before I’m off to China.

My internet accessability isn’t the greatest so please be patient with my postings and email replies. 

Please go to Disco Valante Online and register your email so I can notify you of the upcoming launch!

Again, please be patient if I am not posting.  Thank you for your support!



Filed under Clothing, Travel

Honey, hold my man bag.

I personally hate carrying a bag.  All Disco Valante needs is his credit card, chap stick, car keys and phone.  However, even though I don’t personally carry bags, I can appreciate them.  I can understand when people live in urban environments and don’t have cars to throw their things in, a bag maybe necessary to make it through the day.

When I lived in Japan, it was not uncommon to see men carrying cool looking tote bags, commonly referred to as man bags.  It was more uncommon to see men NOT carrying such an accessory.

A man bag can be a cool add-on to a killer wardrobe but, in America, we will not let go of the backpack.  I cringe everytime I see a guy wearing a cool suit or nice clothing while carrying a back pack.  I understand if you are doing some physical activity where a back pack maybe more appropriate for the wear and tear but not in the everyday commute of a stylish man.

If you must carry a bag throughout the day, get something cool.  If you and the 6 year old kid next door have the same taste in bags, shame on you.

Am I being a total snob about this guys?  Let Disco Valante know what you are thinking.


Filed under Clothing, men's fashion, Men's Style

Why do American women love guys in board shorts and hate guys in Speedos?

Historically, the beach is a place where sexuality has been expressed. It is a natural reaction to wearing next to nothing. Disco Valante has noticed a very telling trend on this thread. American women hate the overt sexuality of men in Speedos. But why? Are American women threated by a man’s sexual presence? Are they envious?

In America, women are the beacons of beauty and sexuality. Meanwhile, men are quickly branded as gay or weak if they appear too beautiful.

Quick Story to illustrate this point:
All military pilots have call signs, like “Maverick” in TOP GUN. My Naval Academy classmate Christian, who is a Navy pilot, is probably one of the most handsome men I have ever seen. His call sign is BROKE BACK. I asked the other pilots, “Why is Christian’s call sign BROKE BACK?”. Their reply was, “A man that good looking has to be gay.”.

American beaches are the place where the female form is the center of attention. Beautiful woman with smooth curves wearing skimpy two pieces swim suits can be the inspiration of hit TV shows…BAYWATCH. However, does a man of equal physical beauty wearing a Speedo threaten a woman’s turf?

This girl commented to me once, “I don’t go out with overly attractive or well dressed men because I want to be the center of attention when we go out.”. I’m not saying she speaks for all women but could this be a glimpse into the female mind?

Or is American just a nation of sexually prudish individuals? One could easily make this assumption based on our beach attire, our view of prostitution, and attitude toward the GBLT community.

Ladies tell us if my assumptions are way off point. Fellas, why do you think women hate men wearing Speedos?


Filed under men's fashion, Men's Style, Metrosexual, Naval Academy, Swim Suit

Are white boxers hot or NOT?

Sexy guy with white boxers and tube socks

I have NEVER owned a pair of white cotton boxers.  I just don’t know what it is about them but I possible hate them on the same level as tighty whities.  I’ll give it to the guy in the photo his pair look sportier (or maybe it’s just bunched up) than traditional white cotton boxers found in a department store.  However, I still just can’t bring myself to buy a pair.

Disco Valante wants to know if white boxers are sexy or just plain BLAH?


Filed under Boxers, underwear

Metrosexual Alert…”Hazel Eyes” is in the building

I truly believe friendship is at the core of a man’s personal style. Who we hang out with and how we treat them says so much about us as an individual.

On my blog, I constantly exploit Erik and talk about our friendship. I want to talk about my other best friend Steven, aka Hazel Eyes. Hazel Eyes is also a Navy Leiutenant and an Explosive Ordanace Officer like Straight-ish boy. He’s currently stationed in Italy.

Hazel Eyes is my ace! I don’t know anyone like him. He is just a great person. He is always voluteering for different causes and I don’t think I’ve ever heard him say a negative word about anyone. A damn goody two shoes! He is a free spirit and don’t dare him to do something embarrassing because you’ll lose everytime.

Steven is who I turn to when I want talk about truly personal things and have a good man cry! Steven was actually the first person to give me money to start Disco Valante Clothing. I want to publicly thank him and let him know I love him very much.

For some reason, Steven thinks he can be a thug or a tough guy. Could someone please tell him guys with hazel eyes and that play with babies are not bad boys. By the way, that’s chewing gum foil in his mouth and a painted on beard.


Filed under Men's Style

Do you trim your pubes?

You’ve just purchased a sexy, new pair of underwear from Disco Valante and can’t wait to show them off on your next booty call. But when you do finally disrobe in front of your new “friend”, they cringe in disgust at the site of your unkempt caveman pube bush.

Where have you been the last few years? The Tom Selleck (aka Magnum, PI) look is out. Nobody wants a furry wolf-man anymore. A smooth swimmer body is what’s “in”.

It can be scary to wield a sharp razor around your “one eyed warrior” but it is a necessary evil with today’s grooming standards.  Use electric clippers as a substitute for a razor.

But why should you trim your pubic hair? First of all (and perhaps the best reason), trimming your pubic hair can make your erection look huge. But, of course you wouldn’t care about that. Don’t forget about hygiene.  Your whole area will be cleaner, smell better, and be much more inviting.  And of course, general sexiness!

The benefits of having a shaved pubic area will be apparent straight away!

Any tips or comments fellas?

Don’t forget to visit our sister company, Jock Muscle, for your private sex toy fun!!!


Filed under Grooming, Men's Style, Shaving

Disco Valante and the Bank

Disco Valante has run into a major road block.  The simpliest way to describe my problem is to say the bank won’t give me money!

After fours months of early preparation and submitting my business loan application, the guy in charge of my paperwork has to decided to renege on offering start-up funds. 

Does Disco Valante have good credit? – Yes.

Has the loan officer ever expressed any faults with the business plan or financial estimates?  – No.

Is Disco Valante a college graduate? – Degreee in Electrical Engineering.  Check.

Has Disco Valante owned another business and made a profit? – Yes.

Has the loan officer ever said everything looks good and there are no problems? – Yes.

Has the loan officer been sitting on my paperwork and not doing his job for 4 months?  – Hell Yes!

It isn’t that I can’t get the money from another institution, it is just the lackidasical manner in which my application is being handled that pisses me off.  

If you don’t know, I’m currently in the Middle East and two weeks away from returning to Washington, DC.  I was supposed to sign my paperwork on 1AUG.  I am almost certain the loan officer would have waited until I got into the bank to tell me the disapproval news…that’s the level of professionalism and courtesy I’m dealing with.  

On the cusp of flying to China, I must now worry about money.  I guess this is the cost of doing business!


Filed under Uncategorized